has opened up about how she coped in the immediate aftermath of a heartbreaking loss. The London-born singer suffered a , and admitted that she struggled greatly behind the scenes despite continuing to work and perform.
Jessie, 37, had decided to become a single mother at the time and was 10 weeks along when she announced her to the . Just a day after the announcement she had her third scan, which revealed that her baby no longer had a heartbeat.
The musician bravely shared the news on at the time, writing: "Yesterday morning I was laughing with a friend saying 'seriously though how am I going to get through my gig in LA tomorrow night without telling the whole audience I am pregnant'. By yesterday afternoon I was dreading the thought of getting through the gig without breaking down…"
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Jessie then admitted that she might regret sharing the upsetting news online, but confirmed that she would still be performing later that evening.
The star has now described more about what she was going through during the painful loss, with the experience forming the basis of her new song No Secrets.
“I’d just had the miscarriage when I started writing this song in the studio,’ she told . “When I found out the baby had no heartbeat – I’m sure I can speak for all women, even if they have people around them - it’s such a lonely feeling. I’ve never felt more alone.”
Jessie added that for six days she “knew the baby had gone” but it was still inside her, and shared: “It was the saddest, loneliest time. It’s letting go of something you’ve dreamt of that now isn’t going to happen.”
Speaking of her decision to complete her shows despite the major loss, she mused: “Do I regret it? No. Did I enjoy it? I don’t know.”
The star added that despite her sister flying over to Los Angeles for support, she still felt alone. “I didn’t have anyone to spar with or process it with. I just knew I had to keep going,” she said.
After the loss of her baby, Jessie later started dating Chanan Colman and became pregnant within seven months. The duo went on to , but the singer acknowledged that her .
She shared: “Once you lose a baby, and you’ve been told it’s not going to be easy to carry, I just assumed I was going to lose him too. I had so many scans at the beginning. I spent an absurd amount of money on them.”
Jessie revealed that she stopped dying her naturally-blonde hair and eyebrows out of fear for her son, and explained: “I was so strict. I didn’t leave the house and even down to products - I just wanted it to go right.”
If you have been affected by this story, advice and support can be found at the Miscarriage Association. You can call them on 01924 200799 or email
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